Living Psalms Book
Psalms in the form of words and art, reborn in the specific contexts of our world, privileging the voices of historically marginalized communities and those acting in solidarity with them.

Living Psalm 130—Pentecost 11B

I am afraid. I don’t know what’s happening. I feel alone. Despair wants to take over. I try to center myself. Yet, I cannot. 

Looking to the right, I see no escape. The left offers no better solution to the darkness and despair that have overtaken my body. The only solution I come to feels contrived. I am alone again, naturally. 

I only know to shout to the heavens, praying maybe beyond hope that your rod and your staff are still with me. Are they close? Have I lost them again? Be attentive to my plea. I cannot move forward on my own, though I like to pretend that I can. 

Hear, comprehend, and embrace the voice, spoken or the one within me, I reach out knowing that I’m only human. Don’t tell that to anyone. I have a reputation to maintain. I plead. Be with me when I cannot be with myself. That’s usually the case, God.
If you focus on my human frailty, there is no way God. I can pretend, but I cannot stand. 

Faking a superhero understanding of my life is fraud. I surrender all. I am weak. My only hope is that you will embrace the courage that it takes to admit I cannot proceed on my own. I need you. 

There is hope beyond hope when I give myself into your hands and try not to control situations that are not mine to control. Surrender is easy to say. Yet, it is very difficult to live out. Help me. You’re my only hope. Forgive the fact that I am only human, and that I am not a Super Christian. No soy (I am not). 

I come to realize that I am wasting energy in trying to fix what I cannot. Help me to let go. Besides, it is not mine to fix. So, in stillness I wait. I hear the sounds of predators getting closer. I still wait. I want to do something, but my faith says, “Wait. God, you are in control.”  

My reality is that I more often wait upon the Lord than try to do a two-point five spin and summersault.  I pretend that I am the hero. I think I am an Olympian. Only you God are the hero in the story that is my life. 

People of God, our hope is in the Lord and not our delusional fantasy that, “We got this.” There is steadfast love that flows within and through us when we surrender to God’s great power. My power—no way. God’s power is the only way. It is God who will redeem us from anything and everything that life brings our way.  

Living Psalm 130 for Pentecost 11B was written by the Rev. Dr. Justo González II.

Living Psalms Book is created by UCC Witness & Worship Artists’ Group, a Network of UCC connected artists, activists and ministers bridging the worship and liturgy of the local church with witness and action in the community.  Maren Tirabassi, editor.

Logo is detail from Living Psalm 80 by Sophia Beardemphl, Redwoods, CA. Recovering from significant bullying, Sophia, age nine, read Psalm 80 and thought of brokenness that needs mending. She drew this broken and mended bowl.

© Copyright 2021 Justo González II.  Permission granted to reproduce or adapt this material for use in services of worship or church education.  All publishing rights reserved.