Contemptible Speech
For they say, “His letters are weighty and strong, but his bodily presence is weak and his speech contemptible.” Let such people understand that what we say by letter when absent, we will also do when present. – 2 Corinthians 10:10-11 (NRSV)
Early in my ministry, right after a memorial service I officiated, a relative of the deceased said to me, “You would benefit from public speaking coaching to have more confidence in the pulpit.”
Ouch.
He was not wrong. I don’t always have confidence in the pulpit when memorializing someone I’ve never met.
Truly, I’m more comfortable communicating in this format, writing, than in the spoken word. Talking is messy, unpredictable, risky, even when scripted. Here, I can maintain a safe distance and present my ideas clearly as if from an aplomb, self-assured, equanimous (or strident) fount of experience and wisdom, not as if from a human.
Paul had a similar experience. Someone complained that his bold writing style did not match the in-person reality. Paul, pen in hand, retorted that his behavior matched his writing if not his personality, so there!
The message: be consistent. Don’t write what you would not say out loud. Use great caution when emailing or texting about anything remotely contentious. Back up words with deeds. Speak the truth in love.
Few things challenge humanity like effective, consistent, compassionate communication. I’m still learning to do that and to forgive myself when I fail. Apparently, Paul was too.
Prayer
Word of Life, may all my words today support life and healing and leave only love behind.
About the AuthorMatt Laney is co-Pastor of Virginia Highland Church UCC in Atlanta, GA and the author of >Pride Wars, a fantasy series published by Houghton Mifflin Harcourt for Young Readers. The first two books, The Spinner Prince and The Four Guardians are available now.