When I Act a Fool
Now the works of the flesh are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity, debauchery, idolatry, sorcery, enmities, strife, jealousy, anger, quarrels, dissensions, factions, envy, drunkenness, carousing, and things like these. I am warning you… those who do such things will not inherit the kingdom of God. – Galatians 5:19-20 (NRSVUE)
The South is known for its flair for the dramatic. Why settle for subtlety when you could go whole hog with hyperbole? Such as:
She ain’t got the sense God gave a paper plate.
You’re makin’ enough noise to wake up the dearly departed!
You’re so good lookin’ I bet the skeeters bring you flowers before they bite you.
You got a better chance of me baptizing a cat than me believing that!
He’s so dumb, he could throw himself on the ground and miss.
Paul, who was from the southern town of Tarsus, could sling hyperbole with the best of them. That list of wrongs he rattled off is longer than a CVS receipt.
Go on and re-read it with a Southern drawl and you just might hear the sass. Not just idolaters and sorcerers, but folk who get jealous, angry, or stir up drama? They’re all in the same sinking boat where the decks are standing room only.
That’s Paul’s point beneath the hyperbolics. In the Kin-dom of God, there’s no room for harmdoing. When we’re fully in God’s presence, the urge to hurt ourselves or others is about as useless and misplaced as a screen door on a submarine.
With God it’s all love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, generosity, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. There is no law against such things and no need for hyperbole to get the point.
Prayer
Lawd, when I’m tempted to act a fool, yank me back quicker than Mama snatching her good Tupperware from a church potluck.
About the AuthorMatt Laney is co-Pastor of Virginia Highland Church UCC in Atlanta, GA and the author of Pride Wars, a fantasy series published by Houghton Mifflin Harcourt for Young Readers. The first two books, The Spinner Prince and The Four Guardians are available now.