God remembers God’s covenant forever, the promise God made, for a thousand generations. – Psalm 105:8 (NIV)
I don’t know if I’m supposed to break th “fourth wall” of writing devotions. But I’m going to do it anyway.
It’s hours past midnight, and I’m sitting here with tears streaming down my face. My devotion is days overdue, and I don’t know how to get inspired enough to write something that could inspire you. I feel overcome with negativity, exhausted, and simply wiped out.
Lately, I’ve been on empty quite often.
This world has gotten colder and human relationship more fragmented.
When I’m not crying, my body is wrought with tension, bearing the load of a world with little justice for the vulnerable and few rules for the powerful.
I don’t know where to place this pain, this anger, and this sadness.
It can just be too much. It is too much.
But I’ve learned when life is too much and I don’t know what to do, I must lean into what I know.
I know God remembers me. I know the God of my grandmother’s prayers is the God of my tearful prayers, and the God who promised to be with Abraham is the same God who continues to be with me.
I am part of that promise.
And I have to trust that God remembers that promise – to be with me, always. When I’m lonelier than I’ve ever been, God sees me. When my grief feels as if it’s going to swallow my spirit whole, God has not abandoned me.
I am part of a covenant that is unbreakable, even at my most broken.
In my loneliest hours of uncertainty, hear this simple prayer, O God: Remember me. Amen.
Marchaé Grair is a spiritual director, facilitator, and the Director of Public Relations and Outreach at the Unitarian Universalist Association. Follow her work at marchae.com.